This morning, everyone was up at 5:38 and ready to roll. We had quite a happy back to school morning. The girls were ready. Hair and makeup worked. Everything was smooth. Grace was giddy, she is so excited! She loves the thought of being a senior but does NOT want to grow up yet! When I dropped her off at her busstop, there were some freshman waiting. She said, "Oh, look at them, they're so cute!", like she's all adult. It made me grin. She was very excited! This year, we are carpooling with a friend from the ward who's also going to Grace's school in Smithfield. Life would be so much easier if she were at Logan High, but she wanted to graduate from the same school she's been to forever and she's in the Bella Voce Presidency this year, so she needs to be there. One more year of driving to Smithfield. That reminds me, I need to have her letterman sweater drycleaned!
ZJ on the other hand, was on one this morning! She was so excited and hated that they had a late start. She was more than ready to go but started putting on quite a show for me about how she did not want to go. And so....
Well, I'm still laughing. Instead of crying about them leaving, I'm laughing hysterically about my baby being a sophomore this morning, I was laughing and in tears from her little monologue. I was sitting with my iPad and started recording her after about ten minutes of hearing her go on and on and onnnnnnn about why she should not be going to school today. She loves school. She loves having friends and being social. She's a great learner.
But, the bottom line is that ZJ wants to be with me. All the time. She is in the kitchen if I am, in the den if I am, in my bedroom, if I am. We are close. She started whining and carrying on the minute Grace was out of the car this morning and it went on for an hour. Her school began on a late start schedule today, so she had to wait. While watching every minute go by on the clock, she gave one of her best drama queen performances. I was sitting watching and not saying a word, just giving her looks and laughs. She kept talking. I was typing and she thought I was typing my blog, not what she was saying. It was hysterical. Here's fifteen minutes of Zeej... Totally drama...and, literally, I did not say one word during all of this until the very end.
Mommy, I could Stay home and help you pull the wallpaper with you.
I'll stay home and take care of Zulu. I don't want to leave you. She picks up Zulu and says to him: Maybe if you talk to mom she will make an exception. Back to me: Zulu shouldn't be alone.
I'll stay home and hot tub with you. I'll go get my suit on right now.
My eyes hurt. I'm almost died. Maybe I should stay home.
Aunt Carol is gone. Maybe I should stay home and keep you company.
I don't like my mascara. It's BROWN! I bought the wrong kind! Maybe I should stay home. Who puts on Brown Mascara?
I see how it is. I don't have a choice? I would take a nap but then I'd have to wake up and go. And I don't like that at all? Why doesn't Grace get upset when school starts? She's like "Yay, homework. Yay, schedules." When people say "I love school", I look at them and want to say, "Do you hear self when you talk?
It's sad. They could be home sleeping. School starts too early. I'm in class like Not getting any of this because I'm thinking about my pillow and the nap I could be taking.
She falls dramatically on the ottoman. Oh my tailbone! It's broken! It hurts! It's so hard to sit down so those hard chairs! Those hard chairs are going to really hurt at school. I think my tailbone is broken or dislocated. I don't think that's normal. And that's not just me trying to get out of school. I'm being serious about the tailbone thing. I'm not trying to get out of school.
I'm done with school already. waaahhhh. LOTS of Moaning, achey pains and deep sighing then wheezing.
I can't breathe! My tailbone doesn't hurt right now but,I can't breathe. School has gotten me to this pint that I can't breathe. I think I need my inhaler.
I'm teary eyed. I'm crying from yawning. I'm tired. I woke up at five. It would be so nice if I could go back to bed. I wonder if I'm taking ceramics this semester or next?
She looks at the clock. It's 3 till 8. Fifty seven! Boooohooooooooo. I don't want to go! I can't deal with it. I can't deal with all this. Stress and emotion because of school. I don't even have pottery this term! I don't have any fun classes.
She pulls out her schedule. Ancient European Hist I'm excited for that! Seminary. Health Ed. German. Biology. There's no fun things like pottery or theater!?! It's gonna be really hard. It's gonna be reeeeeeeeeally hard. It's gonna be. Mom. It's not gonna be fun. Mom.
LONG pause then REAL TEARS. I'm gonna smudge my makeup. It's not gonna be a fun term. There's nothing fun except Ancient European History and that's not even an elective. waaaaah.
I got this. You're making me cry. I'm gonna make it. Did you hear that mom? I don't have any fun classes. I wanted to nail it at pottery but that's not gonna happen.
She starts blowing upward to dry her mascara, waving her hands in the crying gesture and acting all emotionally distraught. I don't even know what happened. That felt good because my eyes were a little dry but now they are wet, but they are a bit too wet. My eyes hurt.
She picks up my little portable fan and turns it onto her face and then poses with the hair in the wind pose. Mom you should take a picture of my hair blowing!
I've never cried before school. Mom, I can't go today. I can't deal. I can't and that's the truth. I'm gonna go on a bus and people are going to look at me like, "What are you? You were crying?!"
Now my nose is all clogged up. I'm gonna start crying again. I have three more minutes. I could leave now but I still have three more minutes.
Can you text me during school? I thought you loved me. Don't make me go! Can you text me during breaks? I like texting with you. If you text me, it's me you are there in my pocket on my phone.
I don't wanna go! My eyes hurt now. The mascara is digging into my eyeball. I don't like mascara, it hurts. But it makes me look better.
I have a rubber band in but that's hat I'm supposed to do and I want these braces off so I can see if my lips are bigger or smaller.
Zulu, come here, I'm gonna leave you in one minute. If I die at school, just know, "Mom made me go." Hugs! I LOVE YOU. YAWN. LOVE YOU, Are you gonna start crying too.. You're gonna miss me. I love you.
Then she grabs her notebook and starts walking to the door. I follow her and take a few pictures and tell her that I've just recorded her every word. She's laughing hysterically. I'm rolling my eyes and laughing with her. We hug goodbye. I say, "Love you! Make good choices! Have a great day."
She turns to walk way..." I am a lamb going to slaughter. I love you. You're feeding me to sharks. I love you.
She is a pill! Who could not just love being around this girl! Since then, it's been 30 minutes and she has texted me 11 times. Mom. Help. Mom. Mom. Mom. Help. I'm going to die. Help.
And now, I'm alone. With my sophomore and senior daughters gone to school. Time moves much too quickly. Bring on football and dances and dates and homework and bedtime and morning routines. We're ready! Well... most of us are. Life is good.