So, July 20th was his one year mark... his Hump Day. Most missionaries celebrate that day by burning a shirt or some other trivial thing. Parents and friends send lots of attaboys for successfully serving one full year and families begin the countdown until they come home... one last holiday, one last birthday, one last whatever. It helps us at home pass the time.
I had prayed for almost three months about what to do for Quayd's Hump Day. Lots of families send packages with half of everything in it... half a shirt, half a tie, one shoe, half a jar of peanut butter or box of cereal and so on. Quayd would not have appreciated that humor. I knew that. And Quayd's hump day came at the time that he is struggling the most. I felt strongly impressed that he needed more than a half a candybar! And so... I prayed. and I prayed... and I prayed some more for just the right thing to do for Quayd's big half way mark, almost wondering, if he indeed would make it for another full year.
His struggles are real, they are physical and emotional, and REAL. Did I mention that they are REAL. And there is no disgrace in coming home early for real reasons. Coming home early because you don't like being a missionary is one thing. Coming home because it's physically and emotionally breaking you, I totally understand and support. We know many boys and young women who've gone off on their missions with every intent to serve for the full two years and who have come home just days or weeks or even months into their mission. In my opinion, the fact that a nineteen year old is willing and worthy to serve for even a day is wonderful!
SO. With all of that in mind, I continued to pray for weeks on end and finally came to an idea that felt right for Quayd. I wrote a letter to thirteen men who love Quayd and who I know have "Hero Status" in Quayd's eyes. These are men who have been influences on him since he was in diapers, literally. These are men who Quayd looks up to with the utmost respect and values their every word. I wrote a letter to each of them, explaining my plan for Quayd's hump day package. I asked each of them to go into their own collection of ties and choose one for Quayd and also to write a letter to go along with the tie. I did not tell them all of Quayd's struggles. I only spoke of his love and their influence and asked them to write words of encouragement, their testimony, whatever they felt Quayd would need to hear at this time.
Over the next few weeks, I received 13 ties for Quayd. (Actually, twelve, but he received thirteen because one came in a separate package a day later.) Some letters were sealed and Doug and I did not get to read them. Others were handed to us, emailed to us, along with the ties. We heard stories of these ties, where they came from, how the man had come to own that tie, how many of these were their "Favorite" ties and they wanted Quayd to have "their very best" (because these are the kind of men that these great men are.) It was humbling. BUT. What meant the most were the written words of encouragement to Quayd. We had not disclosed the details of his struggles. We had not shared his trials. These letters were written as if Quayd had been speaking his trials to each man who'd written. Every single word was exactly what Quayd needed to hear!
AND so, I sent his big package early because they often do not get their mail delivered to them personally for a few weeks after it is received at the Mission Office. I wanted him to have it on July 20th, his Hump Day. The package arrived a week early. It was delivered to him on the day that he sent Elder Short, his companion, home after completing his two years, and getting a new companion, Elder Bunce. We are only supposed to write on Mondays, and this was a Wednesday. That afternoon, I received a photograph of Quayd's hands holding the package! I was so excited for him to receive it and to finally be able to read every word of love and encouragement. I sent him back a photo of scissors. He responded with four words. "I'll open it on Monday." WHAT!?!?!?!? Who are you and what have you done with my son? Patience is no more one of his virtues than it is one of mine!
So, I waited until Monday. On Monday morning, he sent a short email to thank me for his package. I wrote back, "Well?!? Did you open it?" He said, "I ate all of the taffy already, but I didn't open the wrapped package." Again. I had to wait! Seriously!? Since when does Quayd wait for anything?! (And seriously, Bug? FIVE POUNDS of taffy in one morning!?!? THAT does sound like Quayd!)
Later that afternoon, just about at the end of his P-Day, he wrote back and sent these photos, telling me that he'd opened the package and that he was sobbing, as he read each letter. His letter was short and sweet but it ended with, "Mom, seriously, this is the greatest gift I have ever received. Thank you." That's all I needed to hear! He also sent these photos and I could see that his eyes were full of tears.
It was one week later that he wrote to me again. I will include part of his letter now:
I am still here, still serving, trying my best to do what God
wants me to do, to do the right thing and become more like Christ. I think I'm
just going to forget completely about time because now is the time to
serve!!!!!
My mom gave me a hump day package and I was thinking maybe
it's a scrapbook of me when I was little kid or the past couple years. Well, it
was a scrapbook of my time preparing and serving one year and I remember
looking at those pictures and crying so hard. Well, later I decided to open
this wrapped up present and I was thinking it was going to be like my dads
scrapbook thing…a bunch of friends and family encouraging me to go one more
year.
Well, I opened the box and I just remember looking at what was in that
box. I looked at the first and there was a tie from my father behind it was a
letter. I set that aside, and another one and another one. I received ties from
men who I have looked up to so much! I cannot express how grateful I am for what
I felt that day, from what I felt from each of those letters. The ties were awesome, but the letters, the
words expressed in each one of them was incredible! They didn't know what I was going through, but
you could feel the power of the Holy Ghost. There were ties from young men
leaders, bishops, friends, and family, that have been a part of my life and
have helped me and have shaped me.
I guess you could sing I hope the call me on a mission and
call this growing a foot or two. Each one of those and more have helped me so
I could go on a mission So that I could share the gospel, so I could bring
others unto Christ and not only that but bring myself unto Christ.
Again, I cannot express the thoughts penetrating my mind,
the love, the feelings they shared with me and the expressions created from their
hearts and from the Holy Ghost. Each one
of those men are examples to me! Because they hold the priesthood, the power of
God given to man to act for his will, These men have honored and served the
lord for most, if not, all of their lives. And not only that, but, men who love
and cherish and serve their kids and their wives and want to do everything in
their power to keep them safe, to keep them together, out of harm’s way and to
hold fast to the iron rod. I'm grateful
for men like that, who fear God. And I hope that one day I become like them…
examples to my children and a man who loves my eternal companion… haha, if I
get one. But I want to serve God like they have done and like so many others
have done.
And P.S. I'm grateful that us men do know how to cry and do
know how to write a spiritual letter coming from their hearts. This is a gift I will treasure and cherish
forever. Love,
Elder Corbridge
I was so touched reading Quayd's letter. He also shared that many of the other Elders had begged for a few of the ties. Quayd wrote, "I told them that they can have any tie that I own, but not one of these!" He also wrote that he wears a tie each day and reads the letter that goes along with it that morning as his inspiration. He is so thankful! As are Doug and I. We are so so thankful for each and every great man who has touched Quayd and helped him become the man that he is today!
A few other thoughts on the package... the one letter that arrived a day later. I'd written that man, who lives back east and asked him, not realizing that he would be in Utah at the time. On the day before I mailed the package, I wrote a quick, "Did you mail it?" because it was the only one not received and he'd said that he would do it. However, in the process of his own travels, he'd not gotten it done, so he said that he'd mail it directly to the mission office himself. Quayd wrote that, as he opened the package and read the letter that I'd shared to explain what this package was, he anticipated every man who would have sent a tie.
In his list, he included this man and his Uncle Alan, neither of which had a tie in the box. He tried to justify in his mind why they would not have sent him one. I explained in his next week's letter, after he'd shared this with me, that Uncle Alan had been out of state all summer long and I'd not asked him simply because he was unavailable at the time. He said that he was also surprised that there was no tie from the other man who lived back east, but figured that they'd not seen each other in three years, so it might have been why. When he got the delivery the next day, he was thrilled because he truly felt that this list of men was complete! I was so happy that I'd known just who to ask and even more so, that these men all were more than willing to help!
Also, Quayd mentioned the scrapbook that I sent. I had put this book together and worked hard collecting every photo that he's sent home since he left, as well as photos of the day that we took him to the MTC. I had the book all put together to send and for some reason, I felt impressed on the day before I was sending the package to get up out of bed, turn on my computer and iPad and pull more photos. I felt that I needed to send him photos of his entire mission journey, starting with APTC, his missionary training camp experience, and then his mini-mission, him filling out his papers, sending them in, receiving his call, his ordinations and setting apart, his farewell Sunday, as well as his good-byes, and then the mission itself. I printed another 100 photos and got them in order, starting over on the book, working all of the 4th of July to complete it. When Quayd wrote that he loved his whole journey, I knew why I had had this impression! It was he needed!
He sent some more tie photos in his last letter. Here are a few. I think this was truly what Quayd needed! He loves it!
This is his dad's favorite tie... his cowboy tie. We quite often refer to a family motto, "Ride for the Brand", meaning we follow Christ, we fight for truth. It's "the cowboy way." That's something that our children have learned their entire lives. Quayd's letter to Doug was touching and personal, so I won't share it, but what a joy to see this father and son share such love and devotion and to feel Quayd's respect for his dad's great example!
We are so thankful for these good men in his life. We are thankful for his willingness and worthiness to serve. We are thankful for the support that he's received in every way! Doug and I express gratitude to Heavenly Father every single day for those blessings! What a joy to be his parents! What a joy to watch him grow, as hard as it may be. We are so thankful for every prayer said in his behalf! Life is good... often hard, but always good!
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